Accomplishments Unlocked

Accomplishment Unlocked: My hair is the longest it’s ever been, and I finally get to fulfill my childhood dream of wearing pigtails anime-style. At the age of 40+ nonetheless. Yeah. This hair style is not going out of this house. In fact, this hair style is not seeing the daylight.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Did not break down and cry while working through thousands of Excel rows and ten plus Excel tabs for a work project. Nor did I stab anybody while manually adding ~100 comments from one word document to another. (Don’t ask…)

Accomplishment Unlocked: Was told that I am a true wonder. (Shut up!)

Accomplishment Unlocked: Finally finished reading 1Q84 by Murakami Haruki, all 900+ pages.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Shared a passage about erections from a deeply philosophical book about time and space and reality and the power of writing which is also rumored to be a Nobel Prize contender.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Signed up for Weight Watchers and then managed to gain weight. I am allowed to have 26 points worth of food every day. Now let’s see: A bag of ramen is 14 points. A can of my favorite sweet red beans is 24 points. What’s even worse is that 1 oz. of vodka or any grain alcohol is worth 4 points.  Seriously?!

Accomplishment Unlocked: Got kids to become obsessed with Doctor Who too.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Watched the Doctor Who episode “The Time of Angels” with the said kids and were so freaked out that we unanimously decided to skip the episode.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Gave birth to a child of awesome who’s been saying “Bow Ties. Bow ties are cool.” without even being told that that IS an actual meme.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Met another Internet friend in real life and did not encounter any moment of awkward silence the whole night.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Managed to stay cool after sipping Malort, a drink that has been deliberately marketed “on the basis of its aggressive unpalatability“.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Had the BEST grilled octopus and the BEST salty caramel gelato in my life without falling off the weird yet comfy chair in the restaurant.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Pulled off “Smart casual”, dress code listed by Open Table for The Drawing Room. I think we did. We were not kicked out.

Accomplishment Unlocked: Saw Aziz Ansari live on stage!

 

Accomplishment Unlocked: Stayed awake until 5 am so I could do a quick wrap-up because my life is so interesting and I am sure y’all need to hear about what went down in my life.

Now. Your turn.

Article by Absence Alternatives

Absence has written 723 articles.
If you like This post, you can follow Lin On Twitter
Subscribe to absence Blog feed via RSS or EMAIL to receive instant updates.
{ 20 comments… add one }
  • Justine June 17, 2012, 9:43 am

    I was going to make My Guy’s favorite peanut butter pie for Father’s Day and realized that the *three* cans we had in the pantry were all expired. That’s excitement on my end.

    But we’re going on a date tonight. There may be a Wes Anderson movie and a very complicated cocktail by some mixologist in our future. That counts for something right?

    p.s. Grilled octopus and salty caramel gelato sound amazing. As does Aziz Ansari live. Good for you!
    Justine´s last blog post…This one goes out to the one I love

  • Dufmanno June 17, 2012, 9:50 am

    If you don’t come down here so we can braid each others pigtails and then dress up like milkmaids, my life won’t be complete.
    Can you yodel?

  • Ameena June 17, 2012, 10:57 am

    Ramen is 14 points? I am confused by this.

    I LOVE to meet Internet friends…and rarely do I encounter any awkwardness. When are we going to meet up? I think we’d have a fabulous time.

    Have a great Sunday my friend.

    • Absence Alternatives June 21, 2012, 12:59 am

      I think so too.

      And yes. The whole point system is driving me crazy. 1 oz. of vodka is 4 points. By my calc, I can have 6 shots of vodka every day. Straight. No juice.

  • Secret Agent Woman June 17, 2012, 6:49 pm

    I just have to pass this along about the bowties are cool thing:

    “It was my friend Frank, a writer in San Francisco, who finally set me straight. When asked about my new look he put down his fork and stared at me for a few moments. “A bow tie announces to the world you can no longer get an erection.”
    ― David Sedaris

    • Absence Alternatives June 21, 2012, 1:00 am

      I am fine with Doctor Who not having any sex. 😉 I love his brains not his body. For real.

  • BigLittleWolf June 18, 2012, 11:23 am

    I’m most impressed with the Excel and bow-ties.

    And yes, we do love hearing about your life…

    🙂
    BigLittleWolf´s last blog post…Girls in Curls

  • Meg at the Members Lounge June 19, 2012, 1:01 pm

    I know now I have a new meme, Unlocking Accomplishments! I’m going to say heading to NYC for BlogHer without my usual partner in crime might be challenging me. But I’m gonna do it.
    Meg at the Members Lounge´s last blog post…An Important Public Service Announcement

  • vanilla north June 20, 2012, 2:48 am

    My biggest and best accomplish lately:
    Drive my ex-husbands pregnant wife to the ER while she was badly bleeding, be right next to her during the cesarean surgery, being the first one holding their child, offer some of my blood (she lost 2.2 liters)… all and all.. saving her and the baby….
    Total rush!
    vanilla north´s last blog post…Tonight

    • Absence Alternatives June 21, 2012, 1:02 am

      OMG. I am speechless. That sounds absolutely insane and awesome. You are Wonder Woman in more ways than one.

      I am glad that everybody is safe, and that you are safe and sound too. xo

  • Velva June 29, 2012, 8:39 pm

    Your “Accomplishment Unlocked’ are rocking…

    The 1-ounce of vodka is worth the 4-pts on WW!

    Velva
    Velva´s last blog post…Last Call for Summer Peaches

  • Naptimewriting June 30, 2012, 11:55 pm

    Wait! How was 1Q84? I really want to read it, but reading it while carefully timing 6 shots a day would be *awesome*.
    Naptimewriting´s last blog post…Dear Colorado

    • Absence Alternatives July 3, 2012, 1:15 am

      Oooooooo. It took me almost the entire book one to get into it. in the end, I like it. Would be awesome if you could read the books because been dying to talk to somebody about them!!!!!

Leave a Comment

CommentLuv badge