Best. Mom. Ever.

May 12, 2013

in no manual for parenting

I am using this title because I don’t know what to call this post. The original title choices were:

Called a Psycho Mom on Mother’s Day and am proud of it

but that would leave nothing of substance for me to write because the title is basically the story.


Possibly One of the Best Mother’s Day Cards

and that would most likely make my youngest child sad because he’s been planning his awesome mother’s day gifts for me for days

Mothers Day 2013 I love my youngest for remembering how to fold the crane after I showed him only once, and what my favorite candy is after I mentioned it in passing…


while his oldest brother admitted, with pride mind you, “Hey, mom. I made this card more than two hours before. Aren’t you proud of me?”


Mothers Day Card 2013



We all got a good chuckle again because we watched Psycho together last night and found it ironic and hilarious and maybe even fitting that Psycho was our family movie night choice on the eve of Mother’s Day. A discussion over “What is the best Mother’s Day movie?” continued over Mother’s Day brunch (yes, yes, how typically suburban…) and the Alien movie franchise was agreed upon as the best cinematic tribute to mothers. You want proof?

The fundamental myth in mothers (even surrogate ones) genetically coded to do anything to protect their young is obvious in this image chosen to promote Aliens.

Aliens poster


Just look at Ellen Ripley, so deliciously played by Sigourney Weaver. (Most of us cheered when she uttered that famous line, “Get away from her you bitch!”) From the other side, didn’t the Queen Mother (the matriarch alien) fiercely protect the survival of her offspring? Not to mention all those scenes of forced cesarean births…

Instead of leaving you to ponder the above, I thought I’d leave you with something more lighthearted: Mother’s Day Cards That Should Exist” (Thanks to Mary Lee for a great chuckle!)


[Disclaimer] I am fortunate enough to have a great mother-in-law. In fact, sometimes I think I like her more than her son… Those cards though funny do make me a bit anxious from imaging my future daughter-in-law wanting to send me one of those…

[Sidebar Convo]: Being an overtly protective 21-century mother who feels guilty if not doing some helicopter-parenting and also if not providing my kids with sufficient independence that I am, I have not allowed my kids to watch any scary movie such as Fridays the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm Street. They can decide to watch crazy horror films from Asia such as Ringu when they are adults, but never ever when they are still under my watch in my house. I’ve seen similar horror films when I was little and I regretted ever since. Till this day, the memories of horrifying images and scenarios stay with me, and they always resurface to the top of my consciousness when I am alone in a hotel room while on business trips. It’s very tough to be on intensive business trips if you can only fall asleep after 3 or 4 am from watching all the  reruns of Law & Order you could find on cable. It’s ridiculous.

[One more thing] After the kids presented their mother’s day presents, we all looked at my husband. “Hey, I made you a mother!” I guess we should thank all the dads on Mother’s Day.

{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

Justine June 5, 2013 at 2:31 pm

“Hey, I made you a mother!” – LOL. Awesome.

My parents let me watch horror movies when I was little (like seven) and I loved them. I watched all the Friday the 13th movies, Alien (in the theater!), Aliens, you name it. But now, I can’t stand them. After a year of Sixth Sense and Blair Witch, I lost my cojones and can no longer stomach scary movies. How did I become such a chicken shit? I have no idea…

I do love your sons’ cards though. Lucky you for striking a great balance between overprotective and permissive, as it shows in the kind of “men” your boys are growing up to be. Please let me know how you do it. I’m still trying to figure it out!
Justine´s last blog post…I Have Issues: The Party Girl Edition


Absence Alternatives June 10, 2013 at 11:44 pm

I still have nightmares about Seven! And I will never ever want to receive a package from anybody ever ever! *shudder*

Thank you for the kind words about my parenting… It’s really a shot in the dark. Sometimes I get lucky and sometimes I don’t…


Jennifer June May 25, 2013 at 6:34 pm

I’m pretty sure I’ve been called a Psycho Mom on more than one Mother’s Day and never for as cool a reason as that one.
Best. Mom. Ever. Indeed.


Absence Alternatives May 25, 2013 at 11:28 pm

We just need to tell ourselves that every day what with all the guilt inherent in motherhood. I found that patting myself on the back helped a lot keep me sane. Also saved me a lot of money that I would have spent on vodka… 😉


alejna May 15, 2013 at 9:20 pm

I love how your kids’ personalities come through in their gift/card choices. Both made me smile.

And would you believe that I still haven’t seen Aliens? Ridciculous, I know, given my love of movies with kick-ass women characters. I have at least made some progress in buying the DVD. (It wasn’t available on Netflix streaming or iTunes. What’s up with that?)

This was my favorite mother’s day post of the year. You should get yourself a mug that says that on it or something. Or maybe just one that says “World’s 2nd Most Psycho Mother.”
alejna´s last blog post…Quick Home Organization Projects from American Hovel Magazine (with before and after photos!)


Absence Alternatives May 25, 2013 at 2:20 am

I still remember the list that you make of all the kick-ass woman characters! I love it!

You know what? I should make a t-shirt! 🙂


Kathy May 14, 2013 at 8:43 am

OMG–LOVE that line about your being the 2nd most psycho mom in the world. How hilarious is that?! A belated happy Mother’s Day to you!

Sara and I are trying to get settled in Ecuador, and I’m attempting a return to regular writing and blogging. Perhaps, we’re the real psychos!

Kathy´s last blog post…Nutty Narrative Unfolding: The Far Side of Sanity Meets South of Zero Latitude


Absence Alternatives May 25, 2013 at 2:18 am

LOL. No, you are not. You are newly weds! 🙂

You are brave. You are. I only wish I had your courage to just pick up and leave and follow your dreams. xo


Naptimewriting May 12, 2013 at 11:13 pm

You are hilarious.


You incorporate image analysis, gender stereotypes, Psycho, and chocolate?

I bow to you.

(I, too, often think I prefer my mother in law to her son. We should get together and talk…hey, wait!) 😉
Naptimewriting´s last blog post…Mother’s Day: A New Perspective


Absence Alternatives May 25, 2013 at 2:17 am

I am so happy that at least one person thinks I am funny. Tell my kids that, please? Yes, let’s get together and talk. Again. 🙂


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