Going Home. Again.

Waiting to get on a plane that will take me to Tokyo Narita, and then onto Taipei. I am making my annual solo trip back home so I can pack 359 days of homesickness, guilt and filial piety into a 3-day visit. (I will spend 3 days traveling due to time zone change and the sheer expansiveness of the Pacific Ocean).

As my parents get older, the necessity of going home as often as I could becomes unbearable. The anxiety and sadness I feel every time I see them though becomes unbearable as well. I long to see the joy in my dad’s face as much as I dread seeing his tears. March on, little soldier. That’s what I have been telling myself since I gave the TSA agent my passport and boarding passes.

I will try not to talk about feeling like a Godzilla as soon as I land in Tokyo. But I will feel that way while stuffing my face with food that I have been missing all year.

And I will try and send in pictures to be posted here (and below if the Flickr plug-in works). Just in case you wonder what I have been up to. *Megalomaniac laugh* *Megalomaniac laugh*

Love and peace.

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Article by Absence Alternatives

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{ 24 comments… add one }
  • Life in the Boomer Lane December 27, 2011, 6:41 am

    Stay strong. Stay vulnerable. Stay in touch.
    Life in the Boomer Lane´s last blog post…A Boomer New Year

  • Kathy December 27, 2011, 8:35 am

    Have a great trip, my friend, and say hello to Narita for me. I’ve spent a few too many lay-overs there.
    Kathy´s last blog post…Follow your Bliss: A Magic in the Making

    • Absence Alternatives December 27, 2011, 8:05 pm

      Will do! It is a nice place to hang out compared to the more chaotic airports I have been to.

  • secret agent woman December 27, 2011, 6:49 pm

    Can’t wait to hear more about it. Chin up – you’ll get through it.
    secret agent woman´s last blog post…Christmas re-cap.

    • Absence Alternatives December 27, 2011, 8:07 pm

      Thanks! So far there’s not much. I just kind of lounging around. For my parents that seems to be good enough though, just hearing me around the place…

  • Nicole, the queen of this life December 27, 2011, 6:50 pm

    Nothing I can say here will make the heartache go away. But I’m really glad you are able to go home and visit. I know it will be worth it to your family to be able to see you.
    Nicole, the queen of this life´s last blog post…It’s not procrastinating. It’s Pinterest.

    • Absence Alternatives December 27, 2011, 8:10 pm

      Thank you! It is good to see my folks despite my recent, cough, complaint… Of course as soon as I saw my mother, I felt guilty for even writing about it…

      Every mother needs a daughter. Mine kind of lost hers when I left for the US in 1993…

  • Ameena December 28, 2011, 9:07 am

    3 days can be short…or long, depending on how your parents mood can be. Lol. I can relate!

    Safe travels my friend, I hope it’s painless as can be. At the very least you know that it’s 72 hours and no more!
    Ameena´s last blog post…au-revoir

    • Absence Alternatives December 28, 2011, 11:23 am

      So far it’s been ok because I have been sleeping and eating and playing with my grand-niece. Yes, I am a great aunt… If that does not make you feel old, nothing will…

  • BigLittleWolf December 28, 2011, 10:48 am

    Hoping the airport mania is not too, well, maniacal… and that home is good and not too hard to adjust (back) to.

    Now being on the “receiving” end of returning young adults, I am gaining a new appreciation for what it must be like for the parents of adult children who come to visit or… (drumroll)… to stay.
    BigLittleWolf´s last blog post…Cranky

    • Absence Alternatives December 28, 2011, 11:23 am

      Hopefully your kids are not as lazy as I am. So far I have managed to not lift a finger… *ashamed*

  • Naptimewriting December 28, 2011, 12:03 pm

    Um…360 days of guilt. 2012 is a leap year.

    Naptimewriting´s last blog post…Boxing Day

  • Joy December 28, 2011, 1:24 pm

    I know where you are coming from…my parents recently moved back to Manila. When the kids and I Skype with them, they seem older, more fragile. Enjoy what you can of your short trip back to Taiwan. Zai jian!

    • Absence Alternatives December 29, 2011, 10:36 am

      Nice Chinese! 🙂 I have been watching a lot of TV with my parents. Right now I am sitting here watching a random stupid Korean movie badly dubbed in Chinese with mom…

  • Cassandra December 29, 2011, 8:57 am

    Home was Taiwan while I was in high school. I am ruined for American “Chinese” food. Just not the same. at all. (My sister and I reminisce about the noodles we would get in the cafe basement of SoGo!)
    Personally, I can happily spend a week or two with my parents, but if other family is there, about 2 days does me in! Enjoy the madness!

    • Absence Alternatives December 29, 2011, 10:45 am

      So you are a nicer daughter than I am! 😉 Random food found in random food court is already so awesome. Isn’t it just mind-blowing? ^_^

      What a great coincidence!!! I have yet to make my pilgrimage to Yong-Kong street for beef noodles. Now I am hungry again!

  • Jack December 30, 2011, 1:28 pm

    My little sister left home a million years ago. I once complained about all of the “family” stuff that I had to attend to here and she told me that I should be quiet because I didn’t understand how hard it was to be away.

    When my father got sick while visiting her I realized she was right. Anyhoo, enjoy the time you have- there is plenty of time to feel guilty later.
    Jack´s last blog post…The Secret To Better Sex Is…

    • Absence Alternatives January 1, 2012, 12:55 am

      I am walking around with a cloud of guilt shrouding me. Like Pigpen.

      Happy New Year Jack!!!

  • Velva December 30, 2011, 9:41 pm

    Only 3-days? How do you recover from the jet lag?
    Enjoy your time! Stuff your face! Hug your parents! Its all good.

    Happy New Year to you!

    Velva´s last blog post…Tropical Storm Cocktail

    • Absence Alternatives January 1, 2012, 12:56 am

      The trick is to NOT adjust to the time zone at all. Have you noticed that I have been Interneting as if I were in the US? LOL. 😉

      Happy New Year my friend!

  • Justine January 5, 2012, 10:32 am

    I wish my home didn’t have to be so far away too. There’s no way I can go home as often as you do and because of that, I feel guilty. Somehow, when it comes to home, I always feel guilty. I wonder – will that ever stop?

    • Absence Alternatives January 8, 2012, 9:33 pm

      I think we all just have to learn to live with the guilt. Don’t think it will ever go away unfortunately…

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