My 3 words? Surprisingly not W. T. F.

Chris Brogan is at it again. Chris Brogan, who I really have no idea of, is apparently a very famous person on the Internet and the social media scene. Dude apparently is an inspiration to many, esp. with his annual New Year post “My 3 Words for 20XX”.

In 2011, his 3 words were: Reinvest. Package. Flow.

For 2012, his 3 words are (or will be?): Temple. Untangle. Practice.

Well, Mr. Brogan, I guess I have to thank you for inspiring the head honcho of my company to ask all of us to come up with 3 words to laser-focus our energy/ambition/breathing towards. Unfortunately, the fist thing that jumped into my mind was:

Move. That. Bus. 

And then I was stuck. I shook my fists at your well-defined cheek bones, Ty Pennington! The rest of my ideas were more like a plea for help from an insane asylum:

I do everything.
Like your mom.
Kill me now.
Let me out.
Set me free.
HELP ME PLEASE!

 

So I put out a call for help to some of my ladies and they, like Jimmy John’s, delivered, in more ways than one.

From Elly @ Bugginword:

Evangelize.  Inform.  Seduce.  Innovate.  Inspire.  Support is for bras, dudes.

Distract.  Disarm.  Destroy.

[Can we just describe you instead?]  Pure, undiluted possibility.  <— Seriously, with friends like this, who needs bras?!

How about “Social Media Whore,” Lin?  I mean whore in the nicest possible way.  Obviously.   <— She gets me. She really really gets me. 

 

From Wicked Shawn @ WIcked Girls Think It, Do You?

Wrangler of assholes.

Excite. Conquer. Devour.

Taker of souls.

Giver of (helping) Hand (jobs) “your choice”

 

From Kelly @ Dufmanno’s Blog:

Fight, win, destroy. [that would be mine]  —> Yes, Kelly, nobody would dare to doubt it. 

Astound, problem flatten, monarch in training.

Create, confound, excite. [I’m getting a great visual of you with flames shooting out of your eyes but you probably don’t do that at work. Can you pretend you are a prehistoric warrior goddess with a battle axe because that just adds pages of job titles to your resume.]  —> Srly, I have the best ladies in the world ever. No bras! Woohoo!

Destroyer of enemies.

Thwarter of evil.

Creator of animal pelts…

 

From Sue @ Lagunatic:

Instigate. Resonate. Fascinate.

Can you submit “I like boobies” just to see what they say?  —> So. Fucking. Tempting. Unfortunately my family’s health insurance depends on my employment… 

 

From Vapid @ A Vapid Blonde:

Divide. Conquer. Unite. (or Untie, if they are hot)

Solver. Slayer. Soother.Rockstar Fire Fucker… (not sure they would like that one)

Personally my mission statement would be Cocktail Maker, ShakHER.

 

From Amanda @ Brilliant Sulk:

How about a fun, interesting seminar: Noose making 101

 

From Patty @ Patty Punker:

drop kick this (motherfucker)

my shit rips!

veritable meth lab

old like deniro (or pacino, you pick)

 

Then Elly (aka Ms. Bugginword) followed up with this email:

 Is anyone else craving INXS now?  Can you deliver your three words with a boom box, some posterboard, and a giant black marker?

 

Yes. Yes. Yes!  Remember these and the awesome music video?

Hallucinate
Desegregate
Mediate
Alleviate
Try not to hate

 

 

With my ladyfriends’ encouragement, support and blind faith, right now, sitting in my official corporate profile is my 3 word mission that says:

Desegregate. Mediate. Alleviate.

 

Article by Absence Alternatives

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{ 41 comments… add one }
  • Amber January 1, 2012, 11:17 am

    Those ideas are awesome and I might steal one for my own three word whatever it is.

    As for the ones you chose? Awesome . Purely awesome.
    Amber´s last blog post…2011: The Year of Positive Change

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:06 am

      Thank you. The credit for mine really should go to Elly, and the 3 word mission idea I believe is all Chris Brogan’s fault.

  • Nance January 1, 2012, 11:43 am

    Investigate outrageous badinage.

    P.S. Time.com has a list of words to avoidfor 2012. Amazing.
    Nance´s last blog post…Some Short Thoughts On A Long Night

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:12 am

      Is “AWESOME” on the list? I have been using that word A LOT. Like, a lot a lot.

      Is “LIKE” on the list too? Is saying “A lot, a lot” banned too? I am in trouble, like, a lot, a lot, if tis true…

      So I went to check out the Top 10 Buzzwords of 2011. Kind of sad that I already forgot about “winning” being a buzzword. I did NOT get to use Carmageddon at all so I’m going to start using it for 2012. And I burst out laughing when I saw “Leading from behind”… Oy. My mind is totally in the gutter this evening…

  • Chris Brogan... January 1, 2012, 1:11 pm

    These are the best! I love them more. A few thoughts of alternative 3 words:

    Shock. The. Monkey.
    Put. The. Coffee-Down. (People use hyphens in a pinch.)
    Shake. That. Thing.
    Watch. Yo. Self.

    Yeah. I need a nap. : )
    Chris Brogan…´s last blog post…My 3 Words for 2012

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:35 am

      Dear Mr. B, thank you very much. When I checked my stat just now, I had more than 500+ views on Jan. 1. (Stop laughing!) To me that’s an auspicious beginning for a new year. 🙂 When I went to check out your post, I saw that my post showed up as the first trackback with W.T.F right there for the whole world to see, I felt really guilty about it. I appreciate your great sense of humor. I’d expect popular bloggers to filter trackbacks esp. for “swear words” lest they offend the readers. I srly did not expect it to show up so prominently. I guess being in Asia time difference was in my favor. 🙂 Anyway, have a happy new year! And wish you lots of luck with your 3 words!

      I think TAKE MORE NAPS could be a great goal for many, including myself and little tiny babies. (Elly and Ry and Naptime can attest to that)

  • Akos Fintor January 1, 2012, 2:04 pm

    Oh man,
    I wanted to leave a cool comment here but there is nothing witty I could come up with so I just decided not leave anything behind.

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:38 am

      LOL. That’s how I feel often when I visit blogs with awesome, cool commenters. Thank you for helping make mine cool(er). ^_^

      Your 3-word is effectively

      I’m Not Here.

  • SisterMerryHellish January 1, 2012, 2:35 pm

    In. Your. Dreams.

    But I digress. Hey, that’s three words too!
    SisterMerryHellish´s last blog post…Looking Back And Going Dutch

  • Leanne January 1, 2012, 10:05 pm

    So, so awesome. I need your ladies. Can you only have 3?
    Mine would be
    I. Just. Farted.
    I think that might keep folks away,hmm?
    Leanne´s last blog post…Wishes and Hopes

  • Alexandra January 1, 2012, 11:21 pm

    You know what? I love your friends. My kind of people. Going to follow each and every one of them.

    And yes, INXS…absofuckinlutely.

    Happy New Year, funny funny lady.
    Alexandra´s last blog post…Happy New Year and Wishes For the Most Ambitious Resolutions

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:41 am

      I love all you ladies here. And the dudes of course. Can’t forget the dudes. Without the dudes we’d just be playing with ourselves too much.

      *cough*

  • Kathy January 2, 2012, 8:23 am

    I’m afraid I can’t top any of these. I’m a big lump of wordlessness this morning. Happy New Year, Lin!
    Kathy
    Kathy´s last blog post…On (not) Understanding Memory: The Oldest and Only Story

  • Life in the Boomer Lane January 2, 2012, 8:43 am

    I love all this. My goals for 2012:
    Meditate. Medicate. Medicare.
    Life in the Boomer Lane´s last blog post…2012 911

  • writerwoman61 January 2, 2012, 9:36 am

    “Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle!”

    Happy New Year, Lin!

    Hugs,
    Wendy
    writerwoman61´s last blog post…And the Winner is…

  • BigLittleWolf January 2, 2012, 11:33 am

    This is much closer to what I actually do at New Year’s – come up with a few “directions” I need to keep in mind during the year to come.

    Were I to go for three, here are a few that come to mind (reading your post):

    More. Sex. Now.

    or…

    Teens. Doing. Dishes.

    but…
    what I actually chose (for myself) is a pair that’s seemingly a contradiction: Focus, and Flexibility.

    If I can live with those two guiding me over this next year? I could make some positive change. And if I still get to add a third – it would be another “F” word. No, not that one. Fun, to be interpreted as you please…
    BigLittleWolf´s last blog post…Beyond Me

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:43 am

      I love the 3Fs!

      And yes, TEENS. DOING. DISHES would be great. In fact, I will take TEENS LISTEN MORE.

  • Ry sal January 2, 2012, 7:51 pm

    How the bloody hell did I miss this?!?!

    I.Must.Suck.

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:44 am

      You had a BABY!!!!!

      And, cough cough, my husband would have been ELATED if my 3 words were yours… just sayin’…

  • secret agent woman January 2, 2012, 9:10 pm

    Those are great choices. I always draw a blank in choosing thematic words.
    secret agent woman´s last blog post…Another way I started 2012 right.

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 12:46 am

      I know. That’s why I got stuck on Move that bus. I just cleaned out my fridge, by cleaning out I mean throwing away stuff from the “cold cut drawer”. We had hotdogs with expiration dates from Sep. 2011…

      *yikes*

      I now have a new set of 3 words: Check Expiration Dates.

  • Jack@TheJackB January 3, 2012, 12:59 pm

    Sat here playing around with a few different options and discovered that my son had snuck up behind me. He wants to know why I wrote:

    “Suck Me Harder.”

    I hadn’t even decided if I was going to publish those three but now I must because a blog is where we share all of the goofy crap that happens to us. Had I known that he was there I would have typed:

    “Love. School. Life.”

    But no, he had to read “Suck Me Harder.” That should go over well at his school. Don’t thank me parents, I am here all week.
    Jack@TheJackB´s last blog post…The Biggest Challenge Most Bloggers Face

    • Absence Alternatives January 3, 2012, 1:59 pm

      This made me laugh so hard I honestly spit out my coffee. Now I read it again, still laughing, but I know better to be drinking anything.

      “a blog is where we share all of the goofy crap that happens to us” Well said. That’s really one of the reasons why I started doing this and kept at it for 2 years when nobody was reading it. The other one was to vent about the WTF things I saw/heard on a daily basis.

  • Meg at the Members Lounge January 3, 2012, 4:34 pm

    Advise. Barflies. Exercise.

    I admit I went to Answers.com for that rhyming thing, but it that describes what I need to do. Advise myself to not drink as much wine, and exercise more!
    Meg at the Members Lounge´s last blog post…I Can’t Help Myself Friday. Graphically Speaking.

  • dufmanno January 4, 2012, 12:21 pm

    How I missed this is beyond me. Especially considering the fact that I spent the better part of three days talking in three word sentences to accomplish mine.
    Perhaps it was my laser focus and inability to shake the image of us using the power of shapes to change the world.
    Destroy. Exclusionary. Circles.
    Use Venn Diagrams and Trapezoids instead.
    Oh, and I just got back from a mental trip to Dufmanno Island where I stopped writing , speaking, communicating and living for 3 weeks straight.
    dufmanno´s last blog post…I Steal and Feel No Remorse

  • Cathy January 4, 2012, 6:11 pm

    How have I not seen this before? My three words:

    outta here now
    …or to be serious
    fierce forward focus
    Cathy´s last blog post…i’ll tell you what i did

  • Tom G. January 5, 2012, 12:22 am

    Drunk, Catholic, Girls

    Oddly enough, these three words seem to incorporate so much of what the GGB had to say.

    Damn, there I go reminiscing again… and I thought 2012 would be different.
    Tom G.´s last blog post…Resolutions

    • Absence Alternatives January 5, 2012, 9:02 am

      Unicorn. Rainbow. Cupcakes.

      Animal Pelts. Mammoth.

      Yup. Everything is different. Everything is the same. 😉

  • Justine January 5, 2012, 10:27 am

    Man, seems like I’m l.a.t.e. in jumping on this bandwagon. Your friends are awesome – love their input. And the comments here cracked me up (especially some of your responses to them.) Totally made my morning.

    But I have to say, after reading all the clever and hilarious 3 words here, I can only come up with I. Got. Nuthin’.

    At least for now. But you got me thinking (congratulations!) and so I’m seriously contemplating my 3 words for this Year of the Dragon. Wondering how to work in “kick ass” because I really want to.
    Justine´s last blog post…Three versions of the same holiday

  • Ameena January 7, 2012, 9:41 pm

    I’m with Akos. I have nothing intelligent to add here so I’m just going to say: Happy New Year. I hope 2012 is off to a great start and I hope the trip home was relatively painless!
    Ameena´s last blog post…too much food

  • Christine @ Fresh Local and Best January 8, 2012, 2:10 pm

    My three words O.M.G. You girls are hilarious! I love Vapid Blonde’s word: untie.

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