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As an agnostic, I do acknowledge a higher unknown force. But I also know that the earth revolves around the sun and that the tides are created by the moon's gravitational pull. Incidentally, my second-grader knows that too.
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Just so we are clear on this: Mars has TWO moons, discovered in 1877...
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But, Wait, There is more!
Inspired by Vapid Blonde’s brilliant idea in her comment, that Papa Bear’s words when read out loud could sound almost like a children’s book, I present you with these…
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UGH, how I miss the comedy GENIUS that is Bill ‘Oh shit what’s he saying NOW’ Reiley.
There’s an idea for a contest – Best Bill O-ff!
I have a secret fantasy that he’s actually a self flagellating transvestite with a dungeon and several Lady Boys at home who torment him for his falsehoods and hedonism after every show.
How else could he actually keep a straight face??
– B x
The Barreness recently posted…Ummmobviously youve not seen my ass
One of them has got to be Glenn Beck. Just sayin’
I can only think of O’Reilly’s babbling as publicly sanctioned and monetized IGNUNCE!!
And I am inspired to make a storybook of some of Palin’s nonsense. This idea is copyrighted. It might take me days to get around to it, but it’s mine…MINE, I tell you! All you super smart mommy bloggers, step away from the Palin storybook idea.
Nance recently posted…For Suzi- An Analgesic
I CANNOT wait for Sarah Palin storybooks!
(You know, deep down, I am sensing this fear that she may just come out with real storybooks for Children… Glenn Beck did with Christmas Sweater right? *shudder*)
Given where the dialogue came from I think an age group rating of in utero is a much more accurate than 13+.
linlah recently posted…BCC 20 other people with your left hand
I agree. Was thinking perhaps we should give children the freedom to believe whatever they think how the world works… but you are right. By second grade, they have learned enough science…
bill o’reilly is proof that God doesn’t take himself too seriously.
LOL. Tru dat!
That little fit should have been concluded with “Nanny nanny boo boo.”
Not that I needed convincing, but he is such an incredible moron that it pains me. It pains me because so many people listen to him with no recognition that he is says ridiculous things. The presence of planets and stars does not “prove” the existence of a god. ”
secret agent woman recently posted…Weird Menu
EXACTLY!
I can’t wait to write the Gretchen Carlson book, she’s the one that always sounds the most inane me. Especially when she sports her cocktail dress attire.
Meg at the Members Lounge recently posted…I Can’t Help Myself Friday The Penalty Box
Anything sounds better when you deliver it in a cocktail dress.
Um… YOUR wisdom that is. (Complete with sunshine and moonglow… or is that moonshine?)
BigLittleWolf recently posted…Wonky Woman Found Floating- Flailing- Muttering Authorities Investigate
I am totally making Virginian Confucius proud!
Always a relief to find wisdom on the Internet… 😉
I haven’t even had my coffee yet this morning, and you have made me laugh. I don’t think that’s ever happened before.
Renee Fisher recently posted…Fashion Begins At Home
THANK goodness you did not spill your coffee. I don’t make any money from this blog, people. So stop sending me your dry cleaning bills and shit!
Wait… are you telling me that Mars has TWO moons and we only have one? That hardly seems fair.
I’ll be honest, Bill O’Riley isn’t someone I usually look to for answers but, if this sort of stuff is a regular happening on his program, I might start watching just for entertainment purposes.
Posky recently posted…Giant Dogs and Unlikely Ova- Another True Story
I am SO relieved that you don’t usually look for answers by watching Papa Bear! 😉
probably the freaking BEST political slam post I have read this year… 1 and only 1 of the reasons I adore you like mad.
ThePittsofBeingPeachy recently posted…Canaries are Crackheads and Angry Birds is killing things
Awwww. You are too kind. Thank you sweet peach! Let me be careful not to squeeze you too hard. 😉
And never a miscommunication from Fox News either, right? So clearly God is on their side. GRRRR.
Andrea recently posted…Runaway
700 Club. Direct line to God. And to people’s wallets. And in some cases, their pants.
“And in some cases, their pants.” Best line evah!!!!!
This whole thing just has me laughing so hard! I love, love, love you ladies!!!!
I think perhaps, just maybe, Mars moons are orbiting around Bill’s hot air!
Wicked Shawn recently posted…sits quietly in the corner rocking and twirling hair
And you can go sit in the corner with him while twirling his hot hair…
Bawhahaha. 😉
*DUCKING whatever you are throwing at me*
(Please let it be your bras. Please let it be your bras)
And we love you too! I hope you get a good night sleep and that you get to enjoy some downtime this weekend.
Your little sun is so cheery and genuinely thankful to finally know where he comes from. I love it when there is a happy ending.
I also need to pass the information about Mars having two moons along to my friends who learned this week that Egypt is in northern Africa. There was quite a fight over this with one side screaming it was in the middle east and the other sticking to it’s Africa guns.
Then some wisenheimer got on the Wiki and pointed out that because of the Sinai Peninsula it’s a “transcontinental” country.
Then we all had to look up transcontinental in our online dictionaries.
Needless to say this was all very exhausting so we decided to take a group nap.
dufmanno recently posted…Dude- I Got Knocked Out
Group nap FTW! Did you guys also spoon each other? Is there any argument that will not be solved by spooning?
Thank you for being so nice to my little sun. I secretly think that he is a bit serial-killer-ish. But don’t tell him. Just in case he is not. Bad if he is too.
The world is ending. Bill o’Pocalypse Riley
Elly Lou recently posted…Homesick Ukulele
You are actually right! Some of these words reminded me of the song “The End of The World”. Incidentally the only song I know more than 90% of the lyrics to.
It almost sounds like a childrens story when you read it with a slight lilt to your voice.
A Vapid Blonde recently posted…Alligator Heads and Crusty Baguettes
Oh my god Vapid that’s brilliant! I just did it in the voice of an English governess reading to the children in her care and it sounded amazing!
Then I used cruelty and shame to make the pretend children behave but whatever.
dufmanno recently posted…Dude- I Got Knocked Out
I think it could recorded simultaneously with “Good Night Moon” for maximum ridiculousness. Or it could make a sweet rap.
Andrea recently posted…Runaway
Spoken poetry a la William Shatner??!!
I was totally inspired by this discussion so I went and made two children’s books…
Did you force them to drink Cod Liver Oil?
Cruel cruel woman.
Vapid baby, you are my muse!
I was inspired by this keen observation and I made two children’s books. 🙂
HOLY SHIT… I went to bed way too early! I didn’t get my bedtime story! XOXO
A Vapid Blonde recently posted…Alligator Heads and Crusty Baguettes
You are in luck! You can choose either Papa Bear or Mama Grizzly to read you your bedtime story! 😉