My favorite album of all time is A Night at the Opera by Queen. On some days I would simply listen to the whole album over and over again when I am driving. Volume turned way high. Windows down. (And yes, it helps me imagine myself as a badass. Why?)
On some nights, I prowl through YouTube, watching Freddie Mercury, and cry.
I wish I’ve had the chance to see him perform live on stage.
The regret gnaws at me and that’s why I am obsessively staring at the screen, daring him to come back to live.
Tonight I am specifically obsessed with I Want to Break Free. I have just been staring at this picture for about 5 minutes. And it is 1 am now. Yeah, I know. I need help.
Another person lately that’s been making me really really sad and mad at the same time is Amy Winehouse. When I am not replaying the A Night at the Opera CD in my car, I am listening to her Back to Black. I cannot get enough of the rawness in her voice. When she sang, (and yes it’s a cliche) she poured her entire self into it, she did not hold back. Perhaps that was why she was so lost at the end. The tepid air was conjured into a torrent of emotions. Here’s little old me, listening to the breaking in her voice as I hit the repeat button over and over, cursing at her for getting herself killed at the age of 27.
With a talent so vast as hers, it’s almost like her cross to bear to give us more. To give us all.
As I watched most of the videos of her live concerts though, it soon became obvious that she was lost, in pain. In some she could not even remember the lyrics. Such talent. It’s heart-breaking. It makes listening to her songs a multi-faceted exercise.
Fortunately, there is this new video of Tony Bennett singing Body and Soul with her that hints at the joy she must have felt (when she could) from being able to create beauty such as this.
This is 100% random rambling. Tis 2:30 am now. I have been suffering from severe allergy attack this week. I cannot breathe. I am probably delirious and hallucinating.
Oh how I wish I could watch Freddie live on stage. This is going on my Bucket List. So you know, I will go through life without being able to cross off all items on my bucket list. So be it.
Your bucket list makes me cognizant of mine. Freddie rocked it out at the Boston Garden in 1977; it’s still seared in my brain. Looking forward to the Amy/Tony duet, I have seen him twice. Talk about a someone who gives his all on concert. He’s 85 so I feel lucky to have seen him at his best.
Meg at the Members Lounge recently posted…I Can’t Help Myself Friday. For Your Reading Pleasure.
So. Jealous. He came alive on stage. Yet he was so quiet and almost shy. I know many great actors like that. (Well, not personally of course…)
I was cycling yesterday, when your post popped into my head (because, well, I need to contemplate first before I can write a comment, obviously), and I spontaneously started singing “I want to break free”. Not just softly, in my head, but out and loud and for everyone to hear – not that there was anyone to hear. Or so I thought – I was just belting out the second FREEEEEE when a young dad, his 2-year old on the back of his bike, cycled passed me, a smirk plastered on his face. I should have been embarrassed, but I smirked right back at him.
I thought I’d let you know.
Because, well… Freddie’s legacy is still alive – even when it’s sung out of tune on a random Swedish street-, and therefore, so is he.
Lies recently posted…The joys and quirks of language (or not)
I love this! I have been humming this song too. And it makes me want to vacuum the house! 😉 I think he’s beloved all over the world: there is this famous statue of his in Switzerland of all places, right?
I have been watching their concerts on YouTube nonstop. The 20 minutes they did at Live Aid took my breath away. He was so good. So so so very good.
Great songs, both. Sigh. Yes.
Andrea recently posted…Speechless Yet Again
Sigh…. …
I would have liked to have seen Freddy live, too. Amy, not so much. I loved her voice but it would have made me too sad to watch someone traveling down such an obvious road of destruction. I would have most likely stormed the stage and demanded an intervention just as her security team was kicking my ass out onto the street.
Sorry to hear about your allergies. I know how paralyzing they can be.
I totally agree with you! It would have been extremely hard to simply let her destroy herself like that. Now I wonder what’s wrong with the people around her…
Me thinks you are using your bucket list like most people use to-do lists: as a way to add guilt to an already busy life.
Haha. Kidding.
Anyway, I know what you mean. I really do.
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I know you do! And it’s funny how you brought up “guilt”. Indeed, it’s kind of like that…
Hi, first time commenting on your blog, which I really enjoy. I totally get this feeling, I’ve been thinking this about Marc Bolan of T.Rex. I saw a show about his life story recently, in which they perform loads of his songs, which gave me a tiny glimpse of what it must have been like to be at one of their shows, and it was close to heartbreaking.
Also totally agree about Amy Winehouse, I saw her at a Libertines gig (as a spectator rather than a performer) and she just looked such a mess, I don’t understand why people seemed to have no desire to help her, but instead to villify her.
Sorry, lots of rambling, next comment will have more of a point to it!
Thank you so much for visiting and commenting! No apology necessary for rambling. This blog is mainly consists of rambling. It’s like Rambler Anonymous here. 🙂
I have Amy on the brain, too. It’s so tragic that artistry and misery have to go hand in hand. Maybe if we, as a society, embraced the arts more and recognized their value it wouldn’t have to be so? Then again, maybe it would. Maybe that’s just the price of brilliance. It’s a fine line between genius and insanity I suppose.
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I was watching her last concert on YouTube. I could not finish it. She was totally out of it. People were booing and even throwing stuff at all (I mean, I could understand: they paid probably 1/3 of their monthly salary for the tkts!) Where was her management? Her handlers? I wanted to reach in and rescue her from that utter humiliation. After that, one would probably need some heavy drug and alcohol to prevent one from reliving that hell of an experience again. It’s like I could kind of see why she had to medicate herself like that… It’s just heart breaking.
Most great artist, of any genre, seem to walk that fine line between brilliance and insanity. Some cross and never come back. Others fear it and never put a toe in, forever holding them back. But those who straddle the line and ride it like a bull with his giblets in a vice, those artists, their work becomes provacative, life-changing and legendary.
Legen-wait for it-dary!
SisterMerryHellish recently posted…Down at the Mr. Burger Seafood
Well said!