sacré bleu

I rushed to the Religious Ed with Mr. Monk as I always do on most Saturday mornings. I then walked to the 6th grade classroom to inform the Catechist that my oldest would not be there that day. We got to talking about his son.

“…He has a Ph.D. in [something akin to Rocket Science]…”

“Oh my god.” I was genuinely happy for him as I sensed the pride in his voice.

“… and he was the valedictorian in this school, and also at his high school…”

“Oh my god.” I liked how he was able to talk about his son’s accomplishments without appearing to be bragging.

“… He still tutors kids for SATs and all those exams. He’s very good… He’s at [Top Notch University] now but he comes home frequently so if you ever need help…”

“Oh my god. He teaches at [Top Notch University] too?!”

After the 3rd “Oh my god” I finally caught myself: Breaking the third (?) Commandment right here inside a Catholic school in front of a Catechist. Three times.

“Eh.” I pressed my hands together palm-to-palm like in a Buddhist prayer (just something I do unconsciously when I am feeling grateful or apologetic), “I am sorry for ‘using the Lord’s name in vain’…”

While chastising myself silently for using the “quotation marks” in a way that could be easily misinterpreted as being sarcastic, I hightailed out of there before I could say “Sweet Baby Jesus!”

17 thoughts on “sacré bleu

  1. Jen @ NathanRising

    LOL!!!! That is TOTALLY something I would do! Except… I did one kinda worse. I said “shit” in church once. Not even out of anger of anything, just normal conversation.

    In my defense, I was a teenager….

    -Jen

    Reply
    1. Absence Alternatives Post author

      Well, in that case, they should have been happy that you even dragged yourself to church! I say Good for you!

      Reply
  2. Miss B

    My general expletive-y phrase of choice for the past year or so has been (and don’t even ask me where or how I started this, because I have no idea) “Jesus fuck!”

    I have never said that to anyone in a church-related building, though. So, points for me!

    (What I was really getting at, though, was — you could’ve done So Much Worse!)
    .-= Miss B´s last blog…Shining Silver Threads =-.

    Reply
  3. magda

    Did you really offer the OMG’s out loud? or did you just think them and work them into another terrific story.

    FT had to look it up and share for any other FT readers you might have snagged.

    Sacré bleu Definition | Definition of Sacré bleu at Dictionary.com
    Main Entry: sacré bleu1. Part of Speech: interj. Definition: an exclamation of complete surprise. Etymology: alter. of sacré Dieu ‘holy God’ …

    or

    Sacrebleu – Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
    Sacrebleu is an old French profanity, meant as a cry of surprise or anger. I
    .-= magda´s last blog…Thank You Very Much Thursday: Awesome Neighbor =-.

    Reply
  4. Diane

    I used to be assistant director of religious education at my parish. My boss, the director of RE, used to say, “Oh my god” all the time. One of the more staid parishioners told he she should stop and she said, “What the hell!”

    Reply
  5. Elly Lou

    I used to have a friend that fussed at me for saying “oh my god.” In frustration one day I screamed, “Jesus Fucking Christ I’m doing the best I can!” She was fine with “oh my god” after that.

    Reply

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