Tag Archives: comments are the best part

Sucker Punched

Warning: This post is a RANT with a heavily identity politics bend. So if you have no time nor patience to listen to People of Color whining “Oh no not that wah-wah we want to be represented crap again!”, please just ignore me when I come back down from my high horse.

I AM BACK! PEOPLE! Remember what I said? That a good case of justifiable (or not who gives a shit? Not me certainly!) indignation is the best way to get me all fired up and ready to go?!

Go like AKIRA!

Kicking and screaming like Sucker Punch!

I read an article on Racialicious today that made me pause everything I was doing to write a long comment. It surfaces up all the internal debates I have had about identity politics, about ownerships, about representations, about who gets to represent whom, about the gaze.

“An Uncomfortable Silence: Why Is Geek Media Keeping Quiet About The akira Remake?”

Long story short: the manga series and anime films AKIRA have long been revered by fans all over the world, including the self-professed Otakus in the U.S. (I should really write about “Otaku” and the adoption of this self-identity by the youth / geek culture in the U.S. … Focus. Focus!) There has been a rumor for many years that a major adaptation by Hollywood is in the works while fans all over hold their breath waiting for the announcement of WHO will be playing their beloved biker gang in a post-apocalyptic world. Lists of actors have been floating around and it becomes more and more alarming to the Asian American community as EVERYONE attached to play to lead characters so far has been… Lily white.

The GEEK community, usually considered to be progressive and presumably to be more aware of the reality of “racial diversity” in major urban cities in the U.S., has been quiet about this. NO protest. NO griping in the chat rooms.

Seriously? If even the self-professed self-identified Otakus have deserted our cause, why does Hollywood have to give a rat’s ass about under-representation by Asian American actors, especially MALE actors?

Anyway, here is my long comment. I am sharing it here in case the editors over at Racialicious deems my comment unworthy of being published over on their site…

Thank you so much for this article! I was just lamenting this fact of Hollywood coopting the fringe Geek Culture (manga, anime) and “Whitewashing” it to try to mainstream it all in the pursuit of something NEW to revitalize the at-risk film industry (Hello YouTube!)

I saw the trailer for Sucker Punch and it looked like a balled-up conglomeration of every Otaku’s fantasy from anime and mange rolled into one. As far as I could tell, all of the lead girls (yes, they are MEANT to be objectified as girls, so no disrespect on my part) are blonde and so pale they glow in the dark. “So this is it? We can’t f*** get a break? They are taking away manga and anime from us too?”

(Let’s not go into the whole obvious issue of the problematic of perpetually objectifying women in the name of empowering them through hyper-sexualization…)

On a bright note, actually, now I think about it, I am not sure whether this counts as a plus or minus but the ONLY U.S. movie I know with an Asian American male lead who is NOT a kung fu master and who actually gets to kiss and gets the girl aka Debbie Gibson (sorry about the spoiler; and IF you don’t know who Debbi Gibson is then you are too young and I shouldn’t be talking to you…) is Vic Chao in… “Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus”…

In this post-Obama juncture, I have many people telling me that we are a “color blind” society and I should NOT be so hung up on race/ethnicity/blah blah blah, implying that by not letting go I am being the “racist” myself because I seem to be the only one seeing race. Now I get it. “Color blind” means “Universal” which in turn applies to “WHITES ONLY” as in “White actors/actresses can represent any culture especially in the post-apocalyptic universe previously residing in manga/anime aka Japanese culture”. Sorry. I’d better stop since I am merely repeating myself: I have written about this in my graduate school more than a decade ago.

I Comment Therefore I Am: Vaginas, Mama Grizzlies and War on Stupidity

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Hello? *Tapping the microphone* Is this thing on? *Sorry for the screeeeching feedback*

Hi. My name is Lin. And I run my mouth here. I sometimes do a set called “I Comment Therefore I Am” because comments more often than not are the best part. In the interest of full disclosure: Today I am going to lure you in with VAGINA in the title of my post so I can later feed you liberal/DEM propaganda.

The set about vaginae is quite funny. I think. At least they are not “political”. However, if you think about it: The personal is political has been the rallying cry for the feminist movement in the 60s and 70s, and we owe it to our foremothers/sisters for our freedom to say VAGINA! as loud as we wish without being stoned to death…

Scene 1: Unknown Mami and Her Vagina Started an One-up(wo)manship

This was going to be a story within a story. Long story short: Unknown Mami commented on Nancy’s post at Away We Go in which a game of bluffing about what your vagina can do is suggested. Thus began an epic One-up(wo)manship, and hilarity ensued. Some of the choice bits (No pun intended. *whistling*):

Unknown Mami commented,

Puh-leaze, my vagina can bring home the bacon, fry it up in a pan.

My vagina was once cast as Richard the III. Sure people were confused, but I’m sure Shakespeare was proud.

Nancy retorted,

My vagina, thankfully, has never been compared to Falstaff.

My vagina once split the atom. Just sayin.

And it goes on and on. It is epic! Like The Lord(ess) of the Ring. You have to be there to fully appreciate the epicness. I spent the whole day trying to come up with a followup comment, a sequel that does not suck (Yeah, good luck! I know…) Here is what I would have commented if my vagina were not too busy surfing porn:

My vagina is having performance anxiety the whole day, wondering how she can beat your vaginas. In the mean time she finished reading all 15,637 posts on her Google Reader and left intelligent, perceptive, thought-provoking (and heartfelt, if the situations called for it) comments on all. She also tweeted this and immediately got more followers than @aplusk!

Scene 2: What’s VAGINA! got to do with it?

Pardon me while I get my soapbox out. *Dusting it. Getting onto the soap box*

All this fun with our VAGINA!, perhaps paradoxically, brings up another point I wish to make: Having a vagina can only unite us this far. Aside from our bodies, there lies a risk of assuming some sort of solidarity amongst women across ALL issues. Do not assume that just because we all have vaginas, we are necessarily fighting all the same battles, from the same side.

Arianna Huffington‘s post Sarah Palin, “Mama Grizzlies,” Carl Jung, and the Power of Archetypes provides an interesting way of reading Sarah Palin’s Mama Grizzlies video, or rather, its resonance amongst certain segments in the nation.

Here are some of Palin’s memorable quotes from the now (in)famous video:

“It seems like it’s kind of a mom awakening… women are rising up.”

“I always think of the mama grizzly bears that rise up on their hind legs when somebody is coming to attack their cubs.”

“You thought pit bulls were tough? Well, you don’t wanna mess with the mama grizzlies!”

Ms. Huffinton’s point is that if we interpret the Sarah Palin brand and its effect on its audience from the perspective of Carl Jung’s “collective unconscious”, it is easy to understand and even appreciate how and why she is able to gain such a loyal following even when the more mainstream Republicans have tried to distance themselves from her. “Mama grizzlies” are archetypes, the unconscious, shared human instinct that Palin has invoked in her recent public appearances, touching upon the White middle-class fear of losing the established ground they have become so accustomed to, have taken for granted, inciting the basic human nature to fight for the survival* of the species, whipping her followers into a frenzy.

* You say “Survival”, I say “Compared to what?”

Here is what Carl Jung has to say on the power that archetypes wield over the unconscious:

[During troubled conditions experienced by large numbers of people] … explosive and dangerous forces hidden in the archetype come into action, frequently with unpredictable consequences. There is no lunacy people under the domination of an archetype will not fall prey to.

Not to be outdone by Herr Jung, I decided to throw in my own missive:

Thank you for this enlightening analysis on the power and danger of the paradox that is Sarah Palin. I just want to add that I am pissed as hell. There are Mama Grizzlies on this side as well, no? I for one am wanting to rise up on my hind legs because I do NOT want my kids to grow up in a society where

ignorance is “appreciated” as genuineness,

inability to carry a logical and rational discussion is explained away as down-home-ness,

anti-intellectualism is at an all-time high and considered to be a heroic folk rebellion,

and intolerance is equated with maternal instincts.

Scene 3. Stupid is as Stupid Does

From VAGINA! to a tirade against Sarah Palin… WTF? You are probably thinking. I know. I am amazed at my talent for random free association too. Those of you that have stayed with me so far are in this very very tiny sliver of a Venn Diagram intersection.

This is you —> A ∩ B

I <3 you. All of you. Except Elly. For Elly, I *heart* you since she hates <3

But of course, I digress…

I came upon this online essay America Needs a War on Stupid by Japhy Grant, and I have been trying to internalize the wisdom imparted by Mr. Grant so I can whip out the choice quotes in times of need. I am quoting them here since I suspect that quite a few of you would appreciate a good comeback as much as I do:

The right to hold an opinion carries with it the responsibility to defend it.

The reason for this is cowardice. Our society has come to believe that any viewpoint is a legitimate viewpoint, so long as there’s someone out there to espouse it. While this might make for good jokes on The Colbert Report, it’s actually a greater threat to America than terrorism or drugs or any of the other causes we have decided to ‘declare war’ on. Which is why I am suggesting that America ought to collectively declare war on stupidity. If we are to wage an ideological battle against a concept, let it be against Stupidity.

Being the easily excitable kind, I jumped up and down when I read this, yes, while clapping my hands. I also played the theme song from Team America: World Police because I love a good co-opting like every other liberal conspirator. I would have been wagging my tail if I had one. Never shy away from an opportunity to repeat myself, I decided to leave a comment amongst the other more astute, intelligent responses, because “I comment therefore I am”…

Republicans are once again playing on the level of emotions (fears mostly) and not brains. The whole mama grizzly thing taps into our most primitive instinct: it’s either me and my brood or you. There is no reasoning with people when their survival instinct has been turned on and whipped into a frenzy. The news coverage of the misc. protests/gatherings always reminds me of the story “The Lottery”.

We need this right now. I personally needed to read what you said here right now. Thank you.

I Comment Therefore I Am – Trolling

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When I was in college, Deconstruction and Postmodernism were in vogue, later when I was in graduate school, Cultural Relativism was all the rage, and I thrived in the academic environment that prized my way of examining and understanding life and people from all perspectives.

In real life, this makes me a person with no strong conviction, I suspect. My penchant of looking at people and life in general from both/all sides made me a great research scholar or maybe even a good instructor but would not have done any good if I wanted to change the world. For starters, I am agnostic because I have not the guts to decide on one thing or the other. (At least that is MY reason for claiming I am agnostic). I often corner myself onto a slippery slope by empathizing to a fault.

These past few days I believe I came to some certain degree of appreciation for things that I have sorely despised:

Teabagging Parties and Internet Trolling.

Tea Party Protest Sign. Well, sort of. The gist of it.

I went to a live taping for Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me and it was a blissful relief to be surrounded by people who shared my worldview, and I assume, my socio-economical and educational backgrounds. No apology was needed (except I did apologize profusely when I asked to take pictures of Peter Sagal and Carl Kasell. What can I say? They just seem too sublime to be asked to partake in such vulgar activities such as FANGIRL WORSHIP…) No explanation was demanded. I agreed wholeheartedly with everything that was said.

I can see why the teabaggers are drawn to these crazy tea parties! I thought. (Seriously. THIS can be very annoying sometimes…)

On the same day I went to the Wait Wait taping, I also discovered the titillating excitement of being an Internet Troll.

Ain't that the truth?!

I became obsessed with this post “How to Be a Good Wife” on Scary Mommy as soon as I saw the words: “Completing Him” challenge: Be the woman your man needs.

Long story short: Jill, Scary Mommy, found a post on a blog (which turns out to be a Christian, sort of “Come to Jesus” “Let’s know HIM and serve HIM well” kind of blog) that encouraged the readers to participate in an 8-week challenge that will help the women learn/make an effort to love their husbands. Some choice examples:

Make a list of 5 things you currently do and ask him to prioritize them for you of what is important to him. For example – a clean home, home cooked dinner, coupon clipping, service at church, having friends over for dinner, watching/doing sports with him, etc.

No complaining, criticizing, rolling your eyes, nagging, or giving him any friction this week. Enjoy a week of peace in your home!

Support his vision. Discuss his vision for your family. Where does he see your family in 1 year, 5 years, and 10 years. Share with us how you let your husband lead.

The most telling part about what this blog that Jill stumbled upon is all about? On that blog, another blog is featured called Raising Homemakers*. “Dedicated to inspiring, teaching and blessing mothers who have an interest in raising their daughter in godliness and preparing them in the arts of homemaking to the glory of God.” I kid you not.

* Sorry peeps. I am not linking to any of these conservative websites for many reasons. For one, trackback is a bitch. And really, why ruin your day or even week by checking it out, getting nauseous just thinking about it?

Anyway, Jill used these “challenge tasks” to come up with sarcastic/ironic remarks about how she planned to serve her husband and become a good wife for him. Of course, the way her audience is (me being one of them), comments from Jill’s regular readers started pouring in.

Comments really were the best part there. Most of them were hilariously sardonic, and we were having a lot of fun, “building camaraderie” as I saw it, based on the same conviction which could be summed up by this comment left by Jen:

I let me husband have sex with me and he likes it. That is submission enough.

I was, however, disturbed and upset at first.

Do these women have girls? Why do they even bother encouraging their girls to study or do anything else if they expect grown women to do nothing else but allow their husbands to ‘lead’ them? In that case, wouldn’t the men prefer the ignorant kind? No talking up nor speaking up? Wouldn’t that just make this whole scheme a lot easier to maintain? Look at what’s going on in the fundamentalist Muslim societies. If girls are not allowed to go to school, yes, men there can continue to lead as long as they’d like.

I am getting riled up without even watching the video. I am sorry. I tried to be sarcastic and funny and yet I failed miserably.

Then Nic @ My Bottle’s Up alerted me to the aforementioned “I cannot bring myself to say it again” website…

OMFG! Should I click on it? My hand is shaking. Actually my whole body is shaking. Maybe it’s created by The Onion?! Please? Just lie to me…

Actually, I take it back. I visited the site briefly. And as a mother of two boys, I am going to be selfish and highly endorse such a scheme of producing wonderful homemakers who will take care of my boys much better than I have been and ever will. I never have to worry about my sons getting beaten up like Elin beat up Tiger Woods. And I can really learn to be proud of my boys when they show their women what their places are in the world. I wonder whether they also teach about ‘submission to parents-in-law since you know they gave birth to the man who is leading you so they are like on an even higher level’ because the last thing I need after raising these brats are daughters-in-law that talk back and don’t appreciate my gorgeous wonderful sons. Awesome!

And… I was back! To my sarcastic self again, baby!

Then “the other camp” found out the fun we were having over on Scary Mommy, very quickly, chaos and hilarity ensued. And that, my friend, was when I became so obsessed with trolling for things I disagreed with and made myself a nuisance in general. To this comment:

Serving Him and my husband is what I was put on this earth to do. I know where I’m going when my time on earth is complete. Can any of you say the same?

(The same woman also made the claim that her husband has never strayed because she’s never given him an excuse to… Oh yeah. It was very hard for me to sit on my hands and say NOTHING to that. I am very proud of my restraint)

I replied:

You are right. I cannot say the same thing because I believe in reincarnation and I have no idea yet what I will be coming back as. If I continue to do good the way I have, I sure hope I get to come back as a husband with a submissive wife who gives me no excuse to stray (wink wink). I seriously am looking forward to living the high life. So excited!!!

I also spotted a familiar face: The lovely Vapid Blonde was there at the party!

I am running right out and getting a pair of stripper shoes in which I will feed my husband bacon while he watches the Bruins win every cup and the Red Sox win every world series all day everyday….because THAT might be his perfect day with his perfect wife.

So I backed my girl up by praising her actions:

Right. Vapid. Work it, girl! Make sure you don’t give your husband an excuse to stray otherwise if he cheats on you, you will only have yourself to blame.

I was high. It was like drug. I kept on going back for more, checking for new development, cough cough, new opportunities for my comedic genius. Now, I am still not sure how the Gulf Oil Spill became involved in this heated debate, but the same genius asked,

Perhaps the oil spill exists for a reason. A punishment for greed? Ever thought about that?

It’s almost like she was a shill I put in the audience, she just handed it to me!

It’s the pelicans’ fault. Ever see how they gobble up all the fish in one big mouthful? Yup. Not just greed, gluttony too.

Eventually it dawned on me: This is silly. I wish conservatives and liberals would just stay out of each other’s blogs when politics, religions and gender roles are discussed. I am sorry. There is no way I am going to see things from the other side when these matters are involved. Try and explain to me why a woman needs to wear a chador and I will show you my bound feet. Cultural relativism my ass. Here was my final missive:

Blogs are not meant to be neutral or objective. Facebook pages are not meant to be neutral or objective. We have to agree to disagree sometimes. Jill did NOT leave a comment over on that website (at least the last time I checked). The fact is somebody went over to the other post and alerted people there that that post is being talked about here. (Wow, that sounded like I was describing high school, didn’t it?) The fact is you decided to come over and take a look and be offended.

It is really tempting for me personally to leave comments all over the Internet on conservative websites mocking them, criticizing them, but I refrain myself every time, because it would be like if I insist on watching Glenn Beck to get myself all riled up spitting blood. Better just walk away. I have read one blog post referring to mine in a negative light with insulting comments (yeah, I am not bragging ok? “Just ONE?” I know I am but a krill in this big pond and oh yeah Trackback is a bitch), I wanted to say something, to defend myself, to prove them wrong, but I walked away.

You can’t argue someone into changing their minds, esp. in the matters of faith/religion, and esp. when all this is based on ‘believing in Jesus/God’ as that very nice lady said in her latest post welcoming new readers. Did you really think you would be able to change minds, to convert people into ‘True Christianity’ that you subscribe to, by coming over here and yelling at people?

p.s. Actually I kind of wish it could work this way: imagine the lives that could have been saved from the Crusades and the Spanish Inquisition. Let’s just try to talk the other side into changing their minds!

p.s.s. You were so right when you said, ‘Heaven forbid that we might be right.’ That is why I am agnostic. I’ve got it all covered. Booyah!

p.m.s. Jill I am so sorry for coming back over & over again. I just discovered that being a troll is fun, no wonder people do it all the time!

Unknown Mami inspired me to turn my comments into a post because comments sometimes really are the best part! Besides, I am lazy. So why not recycle words that you have written?!

Unknown Mami

I Comment Therefore I Am: The Amazon Edition

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Unknown Mami Here is another edition of I Comment Therefore I Am, following the footsteps of the great Unknown Mammi.

In this era of information overload, in a lot of the news blogs, especially political news blogs, comments are often the best part. Sometimes the scariest part. The comment section is like a looking glass through which you get a glimpse into what the other end of the spectrum is really thinking, under the cloak of anonymity. Wouldn’t you know that comments are also the best part in product review websites?

Amazon.com.

Bet you did not know the fun you would encounter by prowling the world’s largest retail store. Here is one that has become a legend, a pop culture reference:

Three Wolf Moon Short Sleeve Tee: BEST comments? You bet'ya!

As of now, there are 1,657 customer reviews of this shirt. WHAT? Yup.

In November 2008, one genius shopper, or social commentator, wrote a smashing, rave review of this shirt, which has since garnered 222 comments. More than that, 17,617 of 17,783 people found the review helpful. Sheer number counts make this review a force to be reckoned with. The popularity of the review and the number of imitators propelled this shirt to some Geek Stardom. Case in point: The final episode of The Office when Pam and Jim got hitched? Dwight was wearing this shirt when he proudly declared that he would be at the bar to pick up the ladies.

The review is funny as hell. Read on:

“This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that’s when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to ‘howl at the moon’ from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn’t have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn’t settle for the first thing that comes to him…” (Continue reading)

Satirical, rave reviews are often done to highlight the ridiculousness of the high price asked for the product. For this $500 audio cable, Denon AKDL1 Dedicated Link Cable, dueling reviews have been written: Yes! It solved Global Warming! and No! It caused alien invasion!

I know. Some people have way too much time on their hands. Speaking of people with too much time AND money on their hands… SOMEONE alerted me to this Land Cruiser for sale. At $19,999.95 it is a steal, won’t you say? But the reviews are priceless.

JL421 Badonkadonk Land Cruiser/Tank: I think this is an ACTUAL product and not meant to be a joke...

You know how I love making a point when given the chance, therefore when I saw how much the baby bath book is fetching…

If this is not a WTF moment, I don't know what is...

I had some fun…

Product reviews as a new form of satire. What has the world come to? Guilty as charged...

WTF Wednesday: Fighting “I Guess I’m a Racist” with “I Guess I’m a Lazy Ass”!

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UPDATE (12-17-2009):

I realized that my attempt at satire actually makes it even more confusing. My apology. I will lay it out straight: The “I’m a Racist” ad is ridiculous also because it predicted on the faulty assumption #1 HCR is mostly about the African Americans #2 Ergo I have been accused of being a racist because I am against HCR. OR, if you criticize my criticism of HCR, you are accusing me of being a racist. In my mind, #1 is incorrect, and therefore #2 is incorrect. (This is the argument I was trying to make by invoking the fact that there are also a lot of POOR WHITES who are trapped in the poverty cycle AND the arguments, on both sides, seem to have overlooked their plights).

The new ad “I Guss I’m A Lazy Ass” I am proposing here is for the Pro-HCR camp as a comeback. And it is satirical. Hard to convey “satirical” tone with words since you can’t see my Quote Fingers or Jazz Hands… It plays upon #1. The assumption by many in the anti-HCR camp (anti-Public-option) that people without health care are lazy asses who cannot hold a job, etc. Why should we help those people out? #2. This proposed ad would confront that assumption. #3. The prominent representation of white people (a la the prominent representation by the final Black guy in the “I’m a racist” ad), as sarcastically proposed, refers to the common assumption that Poor White People are Poor NOT because they are lazy but because they are unfortunate…

Anyway, it serves me right to be smug enough to think that I can tackle such a controversial and complex issue. This is such a charged subject and as you can see I am confused myself. There is probably no need for this update either since you either got me (for which I am very grateful and would you please come to my house and explain me to my husband?) or you have moved on to more important things (I would have done this if I were you too so no hard feelings), but I feel that I need to clarify things because I am anal retentive. The bottom line is:

I would like to see the government TRYING to help the truly unfortunate out, esp. the millions of children that are not ensured, and if that means I have to pay more taxes, I am fine with it. Will they make some bumbling mistakes along the way? You bet ya. But the expectation of imperfection should not be the excuse for not doing it at all. Have all the countries claiming to be a democracy really adhere to the democratic principles all the time? Are there not corruptions, nepotisms, all sorts of Jackassery going on? You bet ya. Does that mean democracy failed and we should just write it off? I am sure the answer is no.

This I believe:

“No one should die because they cannot afford health care, and nobody should go broke because they get sick.”

The Original Post (as published on 12-16-2009):

Many of you have this feature called Wordless Wednesday every, eh, Wednesday. But me? Not talking? When I have my own soap box right here? Ha. Therefore I decided to start my own tradition called WTF Wednesday.

And conveniently, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, together: what do we have here?!

My token male reader called me out on an evasive post last week, half-assedly commenting on the “I guess I’m a Racist” anti-healthcare reform ad.

Yeah yeah I know I just also wrote this big giant navel-gazing post about how I am going to ignore all of you and just do whatever I want. So I am going to ignore you right now for mocking me…

Although I have blogged about how I feel about HCR, his comment struck a cord. I was caught red-handed for not following through with my oh-so-big announcement of how I am going to just go ahead and be myself. YOU GOT ME DICK! (No, he really is a dick. I mean, that’s what his blog is called. Eh, never mind…)

So here it is, a week later, assuming (hoping, actually) that I am preaching to the choir, FWIW:

The video is asinine to say the least. As Professor Melissa Harris-Lacewell succinctly puts it, “THIS sucks the rhetoric air out of the room.”

First of all, the ads (and many comments circulating on the Interweb) unquestionably assume that RACISM operates on the individual level, rather than on the institutional level. Regarding institutionalized racism: You either agree with this, or you don’t. This is my pessimistic conclusion.

Furthermore, the ads (and the subsequent celebratory comments around the Interweb) wrongfully, yet effectively, turned the entire HCR debate around and recast the issue in an ultra emotional light, since most people do not deliberately practice racist beliefs and activities, and most people take it very personally, understandably, when they feel they are being accused of being a racist.

The real issue of HCR, in my opinion, is one about class: the Have’s vs. The Have-Not’s. And we need to recognize that in the U.S., the class issues are inextricably linked to race issues, due to our unique histories. Although many in the African American academia have challenged the “code words” used in the HCR debate, e.g. “Welfare Queens”, “under class”, etc., it does not mean that they are trying to “hijack” the HCR issue with race issues. The poor Whites will also benefit from an improved health care system. And do you know approximately 2/3 of all welfare benefits administered by the government went to poor Whites? Why is that in a discussion on HCR that could benefit all the people who currently do not have any form of health insurance across the board, we don’t hear about these non-non-White folks’ plights?

Somebody should make a video with all sorts of people speaking to the camera, “I guess I am a lazy ass,” to move the dial all the way to the other end: “You cannot afford health insurance, it must be your own damn fault!” Preferably featuring WHITE PEOPLE since as the thinking goes (as exemplified in the “I Guess I’m a Racist” vid) :
BLACKS <> NOT RACISTS : WHITES <> NOT LAZY ASS
Ergo, all these people that you saw just now? NOT Lazy Ass.

And definitely remember to show a mother with an innocent child who looks at her mother and asks, “Am I a lazy ass, mom?” That’s going to be some powerful shit.

I would have suggested Asian Americans in the vid to make the strongest point because of the whole “Model Minority” stereotype — You know: We work hard. We pull ourselves up by the bootstraps. We are good workers. We hunker down and keep our goddamn mouths shut. We never complain. Yada yada yada — were it not for the other stereotype of Asian Americans being immigrants and foreigners. THAT would have served the enemy’s purpose: LOOK. The HCR IS going to provide insurance to foreigners. OMG!

Some random lady “engaged” me on a debate on Twitter. Imagine debating someone on such a complex issue 140 characters at a time?!… Her argument comes down to: I have done my part. Why should I give more? The government should get out of the business of trying to tell ME how I should spend my (husband’s) hard-earned money. AND, this sort of sums up her position: “I pay tax because I HAVE TO. I give money to charity, through my church, already.” At that point, I said, “Do you seriously want to engage in a political debate with someone who was just talking about tits on Twitter?”

That was the moment when I became deeply convinced that there is NO way we are going to change each other’s mind. None.

That was the moment when I fell in love all over again with Jon Stewart.

p.s. Comedy Central’s blog post on this vid is called “I Guess I’m a Racist, Sexist, Puppy-Killing Psychopath Who Never Calls My Mom“… The title IS the comment.

p.p.s. The funniest, most scathing, most intelligently sarcastic, and in my mind, the most effective comeback was found on The AWL:

“I’m of the opinion that it’s always great to see an oppressed group of people attempt to reclaim a word that has been used in the past to cause hurt and shame. I’m thrilled for Republicans that they’re trying to take the ‘racist’ label back.”

GOLD.

Quote Fingers vs. Jazz Hands

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I am never taken seriously on the hardcore race/social justice discussion website Racialicious. But it is ok. I still visit often and once in a while cannot help but put in my $0.02 worth and continue to be ignored by the other commenters that are a lot more serious than I am… Because…

Unknown Mami

Oh yeah.

For the very serious discussion: “POLITICAL CORRECTNESS” IS A REACTIONARY TERM AGAINST THE LOSS OF PRIVILEGE I decided to lighten up the scene by interjecting (injecting) some humor in it:

I see the term “politically correct” or “politically incorrect” as the new “I am sorry but no offense” or the new “with all due respect”. It is mostly used with “quotation marks” and often accompanied by “wink wink”. I think from now on when somebody uses the term in the “quotation mark” way, we should combat it with Jazz Hands…

I thought that was a brilliant idea. No?

Dr. Evil - Abuser of Quote Fingers

vs.

Possibly the most macho Jazz Hands you'll ever see

Seriously. I cannot be 100% serious at all times.

I comment therefore I am not doing what I am supposed to be doing…

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November 30. Yeah baby!

I am finishing this NaBloMoFo with a special edition of “I Comment Therefore I Am”…

… because it is Monday. And Monday, especially Monday after the long Thanksgiving weekend, absolutely sucks ass, especially if you work in an office…

In this edition, I will share with you how I abuse my privilege as a reader and commenter of blogs…

Eat me

The Sky is Falling asked her readers this question:

So, if you were making a list of “Dat’s Some Funny Shit,Yo,” what movies/TV/books/blogs/etc. would you include? What has informed (or malformed) your particular brand of humor? What falls in the category of Sorry, I Just Don’t Get It? Any deal-breakers (for example, “If I found out you loved/hated __________, you would be dead to me.”)?

She had no idea what she had done: it’s like dangling fat dripping meat to a hungry cougar. I totally took the bait. So I commented at 8:14 PM:

Hey, the jokes made me cry and smile at the same time. {{{hugs}}} if hugs from strangers over the internet are not too creepy for ya. We are a family of cracking “inappropriate” jokes at “inappropriate” moments also. I eagerly clicked on all 4 YouTube links and realized: I need to spend some time watching them so I can test my love for you! So, I will be back. Also you left us a homework at the end. Maybe we (your loyal readers) need to write posts in response to this question. 🙂 Promise: I will be back.

p.s. You are making it very difficult for me to tend to my motherly duty. Your posts all make me think too much and I am now constantly distracted! LOL

An hour later… I wrote some more:

I’m back! Sorry it took so long since I have StumbledUpon almost all of them, and tweeted 2 of them! LOVE Eddie Izzard. (Confession: I only watched him on YouTube. We have no cable. And we don’t watch that much TV not because we are snobbish but because we have no time) I was also distracted because I found him pretty… That clip is funny as hell. “We stole countries with the cunning use of flags.” Bloody BRILLIANT! I want to go around and say “No flag. No country” now. I love the Strong Bad one too. (Confession: have never really watched the Homestar Runner show EXCEPT the Strong Bad email sections) I actually saw Louis CK when he was on Conan O’Brien. LOVED IT and then told everybody I know that travels frequently. Yes, we bitch about air travel all the time. I did curtail my bitching afterwards. Now I say to myself whenever my flight is delayed: “At least I am not travelling with my kids.” Being a parent does give you life-changing perspectives. LOL. I have to confess: I was not laughing at the Muppet Danny Boy clip. Sorry! BTW, I checked my StumbledUpon and saw that I had “favored” a Jackass clip. OH NO! But it’s the one where they dressed up as pandas and ran around in Tokyo. I liked it because they were clearly idiots, and the clip shows, at least the way I interpret it, that the Japanese have a great sense of humor and a great deal of tolerance for stupidity as exhibited by foreigners, i.e. they are our guests. We shall not laugh at them, but rather, laugh with them. I told you: I need to write an entire complete post to answer your question. Good one though!

In her other post, “If You Drink At Every Parenthetical in this Post, You Probably Should Not Drive” (by the way, isn’t this an awesome title? And of course I commented on it…), she asked her readers yet more questions. I think she has a death wish by Comment Hogs or something.

I haven’t told my sister about this blog. What do y’all do about the whole anonymity issue? Do you have a chosen circle? Are you totally incognito? Reasons for/against?

I absolutely rose to the occasion and commented THREE times.

NOVEMBER 25, 2009 5:21 PM

I love the title of this post. I need to stop by to say hi, but I need to go focus on Mr. Monk since it’s his birthday. BUT I will be back ’cause THIS topic hits right at home. From your loyal reader aka NOT Love Greg*

NOVEMBER 25, 2009 8:07 PM

Short answer for now because I need to clean up the house and put together a grocery list for Thanksgiving… Parents-in-law flight arrives tomorrow at 9 am! I am anonymous not because I am afraid of stalkers (Not that famous yet so no need. LOL) but because I am worried that someone from work may chance upon my blog and then the whole company would know. I don’t talk about work still since I am paranoid. I really want to complain about being the only woman in my office sometimes but I refrain from doing that now since well, just in case. A few of my very close friends who I can trust know about my blog. My husband knows but does not read it often. Sometimes I wish he didn’t since I wanted to complain about him really bad often… None of my family knows. Well, my side does not read English. My husband’s side… Well, let’s just say my MIL is a devout Catholic and my FIL thinks Fox News is the greatest (for which we have made fun of him and he’s ok with it…) They are really very nice and very kind and they treat me like their own daughter. We get along fine since we do NOT talk about politics or religions. Again though, I don’t complain about people in my life really JUST IN CASE. Any passing complaints directed towards people that you do care are best left unwritten. That’s my take. Because you never know when the written thing is going to come back and bite you…

If you do tell your sister about this blog, and if she does want to start her own blog, you two should think about hosting a blog together. This way it will definitely ease the burden of having to write a post every day (or even every other day). That being said: I don’t know how you would deal with “popularity contest”, “competition”, and “jealousy”. I am human, and I am bound to feel jealous if my sister’s posts are more popular than mine on the same blog… Think about WHAM! as an example… 😉

(Sorry for bad grammar and yet another long comment!)

p.s. Totally dig stream of consciousness writing.

NOVEMBER 25, 2009 9:55 PM

OK. What kind of SHORT answer was THAT?!

There you have it. Oink. Oink.

* The “Love Greg” joke requires the reading of this post Creepoid vs. Bitch for which I also left a long comment. Totally worth it, my imaginary friends.

Yet another “I hate my job” post? No, really. You’ve got to read this one…

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I Hate My Job

This is the best “I Hate My Job!” post I have seen. Found on Reddit. Submitted by PreHack. Read till the end:

“My job is so fucking unbelievable. I’ll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless. The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup. She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself. She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet. Her career opportunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10. I’m not sure she even showers, much less shaves her “womanly” parts. I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store, she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead. In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I’m sure after work. He probably hasn’t been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he’s only 22. He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960’s, and to make things worse, he brings his big fucking dog to work. Every fucking day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke. Hell, sometimes I even think it’s trying to talk with its constant bellowing. Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single fucking day.

Anyway, I drive these fucktards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit.”

“No, Newt, You’re the Racist” Thank goodness someone more elequont wrote this rebuttal…

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to the charge by some Republicans against the Supreme Court Nominee, Sonia Sotomayor, as being a racist against the white people, and specifically, white male people.

I first saw this charge when I was waiting to board the plane. (You know the CNN scrolling texts on the bottom that drive everybody crazy but, I have to admit it, was pretty useful when there was NO sound on!) I could NOT believe my eyes. But I was not surprised either.

In my head I was formulating all these rebuttals, clever comebacks, theories, arguments against charges of any type of Reverse Racism. The best I could come up with was: It is like the Royal Families complain about being prejudiced against because people are jealous of the privileges they enjoy.

Seriously? Give me a break!

Thank goodness for Vanity Fair. Here is again another article that I LOVE so much that I want to print it out and eat it whole. I really should be working since I am buried by projects that are all due YESTERDAY. But I need to get this off my chest before I explode into a pile of, YES, non-white, mess…

No, Newt, You’re the Racist by Michael Hogan (May 27, 2009)

Mr. Hogan, I assume who is white and male (NOT that there is anything wrong with that…), managed to deliver a rebuttal against this utter nonsense in an even-handed, non-didactic, non-preachy way.

Digression: I also appreciate much the fact his article does not invoke White Guilt either, for nothing is more annoying to me than condescension and patronization born out of White Guilt. No, thank you very much, we have managed along quite well. We do not need to be rescued by a knight in shiny armor. Give me outright Racism any day ( Disclaimer: obviously, I understand VIOLENCE committed on the basis of racism is no joke. Here I am referring to TALKS. DISCOURSES.) When it is veiled in White Guilt, I am at a loss as to how to react to it.

Anyway, the best quote from the article is as follows, although I do hope you read the entire thing if you have stayed with my rant so far…

The reason so few sensible people take [any charge of reverse racism] seriously is that there is no effective anti-white discrimination in America or, for that matter, the world. Being white is almost universally easier than being any other color, just as being male is almost universally easier than being female. (If you’re white, male, and still angry, the problem is you.)

Nicely done. Thank you.

If you happen to be white (in appearances) and you cannot see the implied privileges that come with your skin color, here is a great article/exercise that may resonate with you:

“White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack” by Peggy McIntosh in 1990. Yes, it is decades old. But hey, some things never change… or at least, not much.

p.s. Once again, the comments steal the show and become the proof for the importance of writing the article being commented on in the first place.

Michael Hogan, poor guy, he’s being pummeled and maligned in the comment section. It is rather scary and disturbing what was said in those comments. I wish I hadn’t read them because now I am officially pissed. And scared at the same time. And disturbed. And dispirited.

Joe the Plumber’s Book is out… Out of Stock already?

The Absence of Alternatives

My therapy sessions…